time
i'm having empty feelings now. everything feel of no importance to me. sometimes, i don't even know what i'm thinking or feeling. and why i'm having these kind of feelings.
well, i really have nothing to say. maybe i should just talk about the events that happened in the past few days. joyce just switched off the light in the room. that means she'll be sleeping and i'll be the only person awake for now.
i can't remember much about the happenings so i'll just elaborate on some latest ones.
well, these few days i'm broke. only had $2 to bring to school. papa gave us $6 pocket money daily but i owe teng $10 so i'm repaying her $2 each day so that leaves $4. then i'm saving $2 each day so that i will have money for the saturday outing. so ended up i'm left with $2 to bring to school each day. it's not really nice to be broke but it helps me to resist myself from buying extra food and useless stuff. so that can be counted as an advantage. plus it also stops me from going out after school to eat lunch and to go home straight after school to eat lunch at home which is basically bread with peanut butter and nutella spread... yummy~!!!
thursday was the start of the chinese intensive remedial which is so useless. i'm not trying to be mean here but it's the fact that fei fei is lazy and practically don't know how to teach. thank goodness i still have chinese tuition or i can be prepared to fail chinese for O's (choy!). i was very pissed on thursday cos fei fei wasn't teaching at all. she was just letting the class watch some crap videos which is so irrevelant to chinese and it's just a waste of MY TIME. it's like i'm just staying back for the sake of staying back. and i still have to wait for the time to strike 3pm and wait for her to say the lesson has ended before i can go home. i was already feeling pissed. so after class ended, i had to wait for siying so that we could go home together. so i had to wait for her until 3.30pm. wait and wait and wait... finally when her class had ended, i thought we could finally go home but no. she and gang wanted to watch the interclass netball tournament. so i was like " i don't want" and "i wait so long already. now still have to wait again." but even after much "confrontations", they still continued with their own plans which is to watch the interclass netball tournament. practically treating me as some transparent somebody and taking me for granted. so i was already pissed because of the intensive chinese remedial crap and i'm more pissed because of having to wait for them even longer. so i waited for them awhile until i finally cannot take the waiting anymore and i just left with a sort of pissed face.
i just don't understand why is it that i have to be the one doing the waiting everytime? and after that day, i realised that they didn't wait for me before. i'm always the one waiting for them. and i've also decided that i'm not going to wait anymore. i'll just go home myself. i'm sick of waiting. waiting and waiting and waiting. and wondering when they will be done. and in the end, after waiting it turns out to be like this. i'm taken for granted. this isn't a good feeling. it just shows that i'm of no importance as a friend. i'm sad.
well, today (friday) i sticked to my plans of going home and not wait anymore. so i went home myself and i met calister at the bus stop and we started chatting. reached home really early today at around 1.45pm. but i just waste the time off by watching crapping shows on the tv and taking my own sweet time to eat lunch. time. once it's gone, it'll never come back. even if you wish i'll come back, it'll never will. people just keeping growing older and older... how i wish one day, time will just freeze and everybody will no longer have to grow old and reminisce the past... don't you think so?
well, i think i'm done with this entry. i've got a feeling that i'm wiser now... haha. kk gtg now. bye!!!
faeriefable
tell me a story
tell me a tale
tell me a fantasy
tell me it's real
though make believe
deeply in love
so deep to not think
so deep to not feel
so deep i can't sleep
so deep i can't dream
you once told me a fable
a once upon a time tale
for i will remember that little fairytale...
magicians of love
i'm watching this super nice taiwan show called "magicians of love". in chinese, it's called ai qing mo fa shi. it's so nice and hilarious. all thanks to siying, who influence me in watching this show. now i'm addicted to it. i'm still waiting for it to load. it's taking such a long time. i'm so impatient now. well, i shall take my time to watch it or else i'll end up like siying watching all the 12 episodes uploaded and ended nothing to watch, which makes her so impatient to catch the next episode. haha.
well, got back some results. and i'm quite surprise for history. thought i would fail but i ended up passing it. really happy for myself. then i got back emath. was quite disappointed cos it's not the marks that i want. i was really confident about math and stuff. guess i have to reflect on my attitude towards math again. overestimated myself about math. and i know i've failed amath without looking at the results. it's a sure thing. i didn't even finish like half the whole paper. yes. you did not hear me wrongly. it's half the whole paper not half the page. -sigh- guess i need more time management and practise. the rest of the subject is still left as a mystery until the teachers tell us... haha.
intend to go to the library to borrow some books to read, especially mitch albom's tuesdays with morrie. really want to read that book. it seems so nice!!! i've got some details about it after reading a symmary of it. mitch albom's books are always so meaningful and never fails to touche the human heart. haha.
well, i'm still missing my dear cousins. really feel like meeting them but the time is not right. because most of them are having their mid years. not actually most of them but some of them, especially the younger ones. haha. will meet soon right?
ying just started her art class today. her first lesson!!! haha. she's so cute. everyone was so excited for her. mum went to fetch her there and stayed there for awhile to let her adapt to the environment before going off. she didn't cry. she even enjoy the lesson. when she came back home, she even went around the house showing her master piece [ a drawing of her in the zoo with elephants]. haha. it's so perfect! i mean, for a 5 years old, that drawing is absolutely perfect and beautiful drawn. haha. i think she will enjoy these classes in the future and continue to show off her talent for art. if our house is not that poor, then hopefully we can send her to learn some dance too. but i doubt it. haha. well, i'm just so proud for ying! good job!
it's about 4.30 am. and i'm still not asleep. maybe it's because i slept in the afternoon. but mostly, it's because i want to watch that simply funny and appealing taiwan show. i wanted to laugh aloud when i was watching it but it's so late that i don't dare to. cos everyone's asleep. i've just found out something. no. actually, i found it out long ago but i'm just repeating myself. back to the point, i found out that i've got nothing to do or nowhere to go when it comes to internet. i just come and watch the show but while waiting for it to load, i've got nothing to do. that's so sad, isn't it? no one to talk to too cos it's so late. well, i just have to spend my time here crapping to waste time so that the show can load. and it's taking such a damn long time la. i'm getting so impatient now, especially when i'm stuck at the most hilarious part of the show. argh!!!
my school is holding some public performances and we, students, have to go and booked tickets and it's compulsory. can you believe it? so what lor. you say it's a public performance so it's meant for the public and moreover, you can just act, play and dance during assembly right? why waste our time and money? so i've decided to go for the band and string/dance performances. but i can't booked it cos my printer is out of ink. our school is so cheapskate. they want us to book online and print the tickets ourselves online so that they can save paper and ink. what cheapo lor. plus, the online forum booking system is also going haywire. and i've heard that those people who booked, got a seat that doesn't even exist in the theatre and some even booked the same number seats, which means that 2 or more people got the same seat. so these people have to go and see the teacher. and if you're unlucky, they will tell you to book again. so the seat that you want is no longer yours already. this whole booking thing is so horrible. so troublesome somemore... argh!!! shall stop talking about it.
well, i think i'll stop here. gtg now!! back to watching my show!!! bye!!!
