Tell Off!
hey peeps... today, i've been having a very complicated feeling in school... worried. shocked. angry. lots of feelings mixing together. thanks to PLM... shall elaborate later...well, just came online and signed in to msn. then i saw one of my contacts online but i didn't know that person was. cos never talk that person before and that person add me one... so the conversation was like:
me: ermm... may i know who are you?
him: welcome indian. [what the hell is he talking about?]
me: huh? who are you?
him: who are you! jialin!
me: HELLO!!! you add me one lor.
him: guess.
me: clues?
him: jian [i was like is he calling me jian or is his name jian? haha]
me: haha. clues?
him: cui jian [it's his name]
me: i think you add the wrong person liao.
him: are you ma jia lin? [ma jia lin!!! who the hell is that?]
me: no. add wrong person liao.
him: bye.
and i delete him off my contacts. cos i dunno him and he dunno me. no use putting him in my msn contact list right... haha... but i find it very funny though. haha... it's quite embarrassing to add the wrong person. but it's in the net. so it won't be as embarrassing as talking to the wrong person in real life... cos in the net you dun see that person face so i think it's ok. but it's still funny... haha...
well. basically today, there has been many things happening to me... and i dun really know how to react to it. haix...
well, in school, PLM ask me whether she could borrow my long ruler during SPA test if she needed it. then in my heart was like: "eeyer. never bring ruler then want to borrow from me... it's a test you know?" was very unwilling to lend it to her. but in the end, i didn't know how to reject a person so i say ok unwillingly... then she was like taking my long ruler and bending it about... then in my heart was like: "omg. i hope it dun break." and snap it went. and guess what? my long ruler broke into 2... and i have yet to take the test... so i was shocked and speechless. may was beside me and she saw everything... and you know what she did? she ask people in class whether they have scotchtape and wanted to tape it back... i was like: "what the hell? you dun even intend to buy a new one for me? you want to scotchtape it back!!! are you mad or stupid? even if you scotchtape it back, it's still spoil!!!" but i didn't say it out cos it's pretty mean to tell someone off. so she was like apologising to me and it's like just "sorry" like that... not even sincere... argh!!!
and we have to go to the studio for chinese period at that time... then may and i went out of the class... and somewhere further from PLM. and we talk.
may: ok... now you can bitch about her. i dun mind.
[and at that time, i was already speechless... still shocked... worried that i can't make it for the SPA test without that long ruler...]
me: nevermind lah. nevermind lah... [very sad :( ]
may: it's ok... aren't you angry or something?
me: i dunno... having complicated feelings now.
may: if it was me, i would have told her off or something. i could have been very angry.
me: huh? i dunno leh... i dunno how to react to this... i'm shocked.
may: you sure you ok?
me: ya i guess so. i dun dare to tell her off.
may: i dun remember the josephine i met in sec 1 did not have enough courage to tell people off.
me: [smile.]
then i was geography lesson after chinese... i was still worried for SPA test. and may is a literature student and i am a geography student so we are in different classes when there is pure humanities lesson... so i had no one to talk to at that time when it was geography lesson... i didn't want to talk to sihui and weeling... cos they seem unwilling to talk to me... and i have been feeling weird feelings for sihui... as in she doesn't want to make friends with me or something... same thing goes to weeling too... nvm... so i was stress, worried, afraid during geography period...
straight after geography lesson, i rushed back to 3e4 class and borrowed a long ruler from jessica and a curve rule from wan yuan... [thanks for lending them to me!!! really appreciate it!!!] then went to the physic lab with may... ya and we talked for awhile... my heart was still angry with PLM and was still scare that i would fail for SPA test. cos i didn't really revised for it. was slacking at home yesterday... and during SPA test, i wasted alot of time doing the experiment and i didn't finished the graph and all that... i bet i'm gonna fail for this SPA test... haix... no use thinking about it now... it's over already... i'm doom for sure... haix...
ok after the long ruler breaking incident, i am really really sure and really really confirmed that i hate PLM!!! she's been opening my pencil box, taking out the pens that i have in my pencil box whenever she likes, like the pens are hers and the pencil box is hers like that... argh!!! irritating... if anything from my pencil box is lost, i bet is her... cos she always take my things without permission... like the long ruler breaking incident. she took the long ruler on my table without permission... argh!!! hate people who are like this... and i have to see her everyday in school!!! damn it!!! and she sits beside me most of the time... com lab, science lab and in class!!! it's reaching my limit of patience already!!! i can't stand it any longer!!! in fact, i can't stand it anymore!!! argh!!! argh!!! argh!!!
i know it's bad talking bad things behind someone's back... sometimes i do that too... most of the time, i didn't realise that i was doing it... i've been having feelings that SW is talking behing my back... and it's really uncomfortable... i hate this feeling... hmmm... so maybe next time i should think before i talk about people... or it will be turning out talking bad things behind their back... or gossiping about people... but i enjoy gossiping with my friends... it's fun... haha... but it could a bad thing so maybe i shouldn't gossip too often... and i hoped that my guess of SW gossiping about me is not true... i do not like it! i think i'm too sensitive sometimes... i shouldn't think too much already... yup... i should stop thinking and suspecting people... yup... i should not... haha...
i have told my family about the long ruler breaking incident... and my mum and sis were like: " you should tell her off and protect yourself what? why you always sun dare to say things out and keep inside leh... let people so easily bully you... you should ask her to buy a new long ruler for her what!" then i was like: "how? she dun intend to do that and she doesn't seem to care about this matter... what am i to do leh? maybe i should buy a new long ruler and ask her to pay the price." then my mum was like: "ya, you should do that... dun let people bully you mah." then teng was like: "later she say she can find a cheaper long ruler... and say that you buy the ruler too expensive liao... then she dun want to pay." then i was like: "then what am i to do? i cannot expect her to go and buy a new long ruler right? she won't want lor." teng and mum: "ya lor. then you should tell her off mah." then i have nothing to say liao... am i supposed to tell someone off at this kind of situation so that i won't be taken advantage by someone? am i really not brave to say it out? do i have the courage to do tell someone off? will there be arguements when i tell someone off? i really dunno... these are the questions i've been thinking now... if i tell someone off, then there won't be peace between each other... just like what happened between me and may when we were in sec 1... you have to avoid that person... and there will be like some kind of hatred between each other... haix... i dunno what to do... can someone guide me? haix...
i think i gtg now... this entry is kind of long... and siying left school without me and still tell me to go plaza sing with her when she left without me... haha... ok... gtg now... bye peeps... TTFN - tata for now!!! bye!!!
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